We Grieve Because We Love
Mary Ann Bumbera • Grief Support for Animal Loss
Death is a mystery. We have no means to make sense of it. And because we don’t understand it, dying and grieving are uncomfortably painful topics mostly avoided by our society - especially when it comes to animals. In our grief illiterate culture, the grief we feel for animals is often overlooked or misunderstood. Your grief matters and you don’t have to navigate this alone.
Grieving the loss of an animal is different
Our animals quell our loneliness and deeply touch our hearts in ways that people don’t. Unequivocally, our animals love and accept us for who we are. Commonly, they are our principal emotional support. When they die we’re left staggering in grief without the emotional lifeline they gave us. Additionally, our culture doesn’t typically honor their lives with obituaries or funerals and very few employers offer bereavement leave for them. So when our animals die, they’re just….gone. Those of us whose lives have been devastated by the loss of an animal companion know that grief is not species specific. Love is love.
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
— A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
How one-on-one support can help
We all feel helpless in the face of death. I offer a compassionate, open-minded, healing presence to bear witness to your grief to honor the sacredness of the relationship with your animal. I will support you in your own way and time to unravel the layers of emotion so you can source the strength to integrate the sorrow for new inner balance.
“Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life’s search for love and wisdom.”
-Rumi
I will gently hold space for your heart and companion you through your grief.
“Death is not extinguishing the light; it is putting out the lamp because the dawn has come. ”
— Rabindranath Tagore
What You’re Feeling is Normal
My journey with grief has taught me many things. Among them that there is no right or wrong way to mourn or grieve. We humans tend to categorize everything in stages, so if our grieving doesn’t follow someone else’s plan or timeline, we feel something is wrong with us, making us feel even more alone. Grief is never simple. And with our culture’s awkwardness with grief and emotional pain, we lack skills to comfort ourselves much less someone else. When we reach out for comfort, we don’t always get what our hearts need. So what do we do?